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The Prosecution: Beth

Sometimes she films me while having a meal. It's jarring to spot myself on her Instagram – it’s like a jumpscare.

A close companion of a decade, Marielle, calls herself the “content queen”. It can be amusing for a short while, but it weighs on our friendship.

Being highly outgoing, she feels the need to document everything constantly. When we eat out, she says, “The camera eats first,” and takes photos with the flash on, which makes me cringe. It's unpleasant when other people see her performing for the camera – I get vicarious awkwardness. Another annoyance is because meals lose their warmth.

She's not quite an online personality yet, but Marielle is aspiring to become one. She creates video blogs about city life, a day in her life, and her styling career. Her content is good, credit where it's due, but I prefer not to be involved. Sometimes she films me while dining, or just accompanying her. I’ll see myself on her Instagram later, and it pops up like a surprise: I might be bare-faced, making a strange expression or be captured while eating. It feels invasive.

She also expects me to record her at inconvenient times. Often I’ll be talking to another person, or we're simply spending time in the street. I feel like our friendship has transformed into me being her unpaid videographer. She has the means to hire someone if she wanted high-quality content. Upon mentioning my discomfort about the situation, she brushed it off. I've been invited to a couple of brand events, which was nice, but that doesn't compensate for all the energy I invest helping her create material.

I appreciate that she has helped me with my career in design, but I don’t want our connection to become merely a tally of exchanges. I don’t feel she’s fake or dishonest, but sometimes I feel that if recording starts, we will start performing in a way that presents a favorable image for her vlog.

Her directive is, “Alright, smile for the camera!” and record me smiling with another. It feels forced. I need her to understand that our decade-long friendship still has boundaries. I love spending time with her, but I also desire to experience it without being filmed, edited, or shared for an viewers. I’m not a prop for her online persona.

The Defence: The Content Creator's View

I want Beth to see that the creations we produce together can get us an opportunity.

I am passionate about creating videos. It’s not just a pastime; it's integral to who I am. Creating videos and documenting experiences online allows me to express myself and engage with people in new ways.

I wouldn't label myself as a full influencer yet, but it’s smart to generate income from your passions. I look up to people on social platforms who pull off that style of informal, self-made content creation.

Creating content is my version of engaging with life: noticing the nuances, sharing them with an audience that appreciates the art behind it. I never intend to make my friend uncomfortable. Taking her to professional gatherings was my method of sharing opportunities, giving her a chance to witness behind-the-scenes moments that could help her career in design too. That isn't leverage, it's simply being realistic.

I’d still take her to these events even if she refused to assist me, but I want her to see what the content we create together can get us: an opening. I know not everyone likes being filmed, but often unplanned moments is what makes material genuine. Appearing on video occasionally is part and parcel of being my companion. I'd remove anything she asked, but she hasn't made such a request yet.

I don’t expect anyone to be my private filmmaker, but companions support one another in small ways. My assumption was recording a clip here or there would be fun for Beth. Innovation thrives in partnership, and having my friend around makes projects energetic and pleasurable. I never force her to participate in anything, and I’d never deliberately embarrass her. But creating content jointly sometimes is part of how I record our shared experiences.

I cherish Beth’s friendship profoundly and want to avoid content creation to come between us. I’m willing to compromise: like asking before recording, and avoiding angles that might make her self-conscious.

This isn’t about control, it’s about sharing my world while still considering hers. Clearly content creation is not a substitute for genuine friendship: it's merely part of how I live my life and I want her to be included in a way that’s agreeable for each of us.

Outside Perspectives: Public Sentiment

Should Marielle stop filming herself and Beth when they are out together?

Nothing is more uncomfortable than having a companion point a camera at you. I get that it’s Marielle’s passion, but I wouldn't ask friends come to my work. Perhaps she can find influencer friends to create content with. With the dark, looming future of technology, personal relationships are the only thing we have – cherish them!
A respondent, 25

When pursuing something professionally, you can’t ask your friends for assistance every time, even if they have done it before. If Marielle loves shooting, that doesn't imply everyone around her is content. She must to respect her friend's privacy.
Another reader, 26

Marielle might love making content and displaying her life online, but it’s not for everyone. It’s nice she has assisted Beth’s career, but she must to listen to what Beth wants.
A commenter, 27

It seems like you value each other, so cling to that and ensure it’s the focus in your relationship. Create some real memories, where true emotions are preserved, not online archives. In fact, public figures who seem to share their worlds actually have more secrecy than it appears.
One opinion, 53

She seems to be neither present nor authentic when they're together – she’s working. Each appears unsure as to where the line is. The answer lies not in trying to alter one another, but in each establishing defined limits around what feels acceptable to them and determining if there is an acceptable middle ground.
Barbara, 71

Your Turn to Be the Judge

Consider this question: has she been over-exposing their bond?